Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone
a mini-module by Remley Farr
“Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone” is a Dungeons and Dragons 5th edition mini-event that makes the players put on a farcical show at a restaurant to entertain a duke’s daughter and friends during a birthday party. The event is mostly humorous and can provide a solid quest line. It’s suitable for an adventuring group with players around levels 2 and 3.
On the outskirts of a city, a local party place for children has gone out of business. Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone used to be the best place to take your daughter for a party, but only if you had the coin to spare.
Similar to a modern day Chuck-E-Cheese’s, Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone includes cheap party food, games, entertainment, and even a chance to meet Princess Rumpstank herself! Unfortunately, the owners closed up shop months ago due to failing profit margins—but Duke Oleander didn’t get the message, and he’s promised his daughter the best 10th birthday party a girl could have!
Though the party zone is closed down, it is not uninhabited. A wererat and a kenku have taken up shelter in the basement, living as squatters, and some believe that a band of bugbear ruffians have used the party zone as a halfway house.
The PC’s can best be introduced to the adventure by stumbling across Princess Rumpstank’s on the road. Duke Oleander is standing outside, mortified that the location is closed:
You come across a wooden structure wild with color. Bright pink dominates the design, and a carved image of a beautiful princess looms over the entrance. A sparkly sign reads, “PRINCESS RUMPSTANK’S PARTY ZONE,” yet the overgrown grass and dirt-flecked decorations suggest that this place has been abandoned for a while. A litter drawn by two white horses rests in front of the business, a coachman sitting in front. Two guards stand at attention. One of the double doors to the abandoned structure soon slams open, revealing a panick-stricken nobleman. “This is a disaster!” he moans, one hand on his large belly. “A disaster!”
Grigori is distanced from the lives of common people, mostly adventurers. Because of this, he believes any working class individual can “make things happen.” He’s too dimwitted to know that skills in cooking, entertainment, and service take time to hone, so when he sees the adventurers, he believes they can fix up Princess Rumpstank’s in time before his daughter arrives—even if they have no idea what they’re doing.
If questioned about how Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone operates, Grigori tells them:
“First off, the place should be spotless of dirt. It should shine! Surely something can be done about all of this filth. Also, the food is spectacular! Princes Rumpstank’s is famous for its crackling venison pies, so make sure it’s on the menu for my daughter! Oh, and also, make sure that the service staff is on point. No ingrates or the like: the server must be sharp! And most important of all, Princess Rumpstank herself should arrive and—and—do whatever princesses do. Remember, that’s a hundred gold pieces to each of you for this! You have my daughter and her eight friends to entertain”
With that being said, the party has 1 hour to get the location fixed up for Grigori’s daughter.
Party Zone Explored
Princess Rumpstank’s isn’t too different from most other taverns, except there are several gaudy “girly” decorations, mostly colors of pink and purple combined with unicorn, fairy, and butterfly imagery. There is a stage with a shoddily-painted castle as a backdrop, and the only other rooms besides the main dining area/stage are the kitchen and the cellar.
The kitchen has most items needed to cook: a stove, oven, chopping board, utensils, plates, etc. Most of it was abandoned. The cellar beneath contains bags of flour to make dough, bread rolls, and other basic grains. There is also a cask of mead.
Surrounding the party zone is a forest thick with wildlife. A party member can search the forest to find turkeys, deer, and rabbits for meat courses. Berries are scattered around the woods as well.
Princess Rumpstank’s, though unkempt, isn’t entirely abandoned. Two squatters, a kenku named Fitch and a wererat named Scabs, are hiding in the cellar. They are thieves hiding until nightfall, though they aren’t killers. A Perception (Wisdom) check DC 16 spots them hiding behind a barrel. If found they will put on an intimidating display, but they’ll surrender at the first sign of violence.
Scabs is the brawn of the two, but Fitch has a knack for money. The adventuring party can offer them work if they are short-handed. Grigori will pay Scabs and Fitch out of his pocket as well. If Scabs and Fitch are not discovered, they will hide and listen to the party, then attempt to leave. Use their attempt at escape as an obstacle that the party will have to handle.
The adventurers will have to find ways to deal with the finicky girls and satisfy all the jobs required to get the place up-and-going. Have Grigori elaborate or a PC can make a Wisdom (Insight) check DC 15 to reveal the following. Some jobs can be taken by one character:
- The place needs to be cleaned. A river nearby can provide water, but it can take thirty minutes to go there and back.
- Someone needs to forage for food in the woods, or if the party is carrying anything that can be made into a meal, it’s time to offer up.
- Someone needs to be in the kitchen at all times monitoring the food.
- Someone needs to be a server.
- Someone needs to dress up like Princess Rumpstank and entertain the kids with “princessy stuff.”
- Someone needs to keep other people from wandering in. Grigori has the place specifically reserved for the night.
Allow creative solutions if the PC’s come up with them. Putting the male half-elf in the Princess Rumpstank costume because he’s “the most feminine in the party” is sure to cause laughs, and a morally devious party might decide that Fitch the kenku could pass off as a giant turkey dish for the girls.
It wouldn’t be a D&D adventure without something going horribly wrong. As a DM, make them work for that gold! Here are some complications that you can throw out to make the job harder for the party:
- One of the daughter’s friends keeps wandering off.
- Fitch and Scabs (if undiscovered) try to escape during the celebration.
- A group of poor peasants want to enter the establishment with their crippled daughter. Milk the pity and sympathy, forcing your PC’s to be jerks or sneak the destitute family in.
- Making the party roll checks for cooking, performing, and decorating—a failed cooking check could mean mixing up the mead with water, accidentally getting a couple of kids drunk.. A failed performance check by the party’s Princess Rumpstank could mean a wardrobe malfunction (fake boobs falling out, splitting the seam of the dress, etc).
- A group of in-laws who Grigori hates shows up to celebrate. “Get them out of here by any means necessary,” Grigori will say.
A group of bugbears uses Princess Rumpstank’s as their hideout, and at the end of the module, have them return from a pillaging spree. They’re tired and ready to sleep, so a sight of children “wrecking” their place of peace and quiet will be met with hostility.
There are two bugbears and one bugbear chief (MM, 33) in total, though Grigori also has two guards (that can help.
When the fight starts, Grigori will moan that “the party is ruined, unless…” then prompt the PC’s to make the fight look like an “act.” When the party’s rogue scores a critical hit on a bugbear, the children can all cheer and clap. If the party’s wizard uses a suggestion spell to make a bugbear dunk its head in the birthday cake, the children will all laugh at him. The added humor is that, while this “performance” is going on, the bugbears (and possibly guards) are getting brutally murdered. When the whole fight is done, the duke’s daughter will be ecstatic, claiming that she had the “bestest birthday ever!” You can add more humor into the mix by having Grigori be unaware that the bugbears are an actual threat, making him laugh and cheer at the party’s performance as well.
Concluding the Adventure
If the party did well, Grigori will pay them handsomely, even offering them a chance to do some of their “fancy entertainment nonsense” at his kingdom if they’re ever stopping by. If they do poorly, Grigori recants his payment and chastises them. The party should have an adventure that is truly unique to any previous encounter, and the Princess Rumpstank costume (as garish as it is) provides certain benefits!
Though Princess Rumpstank’s Party Zone is closed, the Princess Rumpstank character is still recognized throughout the area. A PC who wears the Princess Rumpstank costume can gain minor celebrity status when interacting with others (similar to someone dressed up as Batman or a Disney Princess interacting with folks at a public park). Be sure to let the PC who donned the outfit know that the costume can provide favorable opportunities when interacting with NPC’s in the future.